Freak of the Week

The nominees for this week, for Freak of the Week, included:

Nominee #1

Blonde ditz and general has-been Britney Spears, for tweeting on Twitter: " Love is love! People should be able to do whatever makes them happy!"

Nominee #2

American Idol Contestant Adam Lambert, for all around Freakishness of every level.

Nominee #3

Star of the Burger King ads, The Burger King King, for his freaky Sponge Bob Squarebutt ads.

Results

On reviewing the qualifications, our highly acclaimed panel of judges had to examine several criteria.

~Does the nominee exhibit freakishness above and beyond that of a normal freak?

~Taken out of context of the most current display of freakishness, does the nominee still appear freaky?

~Is the freakishness openly obvious or is it more discrete freakishness?

~ Does the nominee have what it takes to win the Freak of the Year competition?

So, without further fanfare, here's what our judges, as well as our audience, had to say:

Britney Spears was tweeting about a comment made by Miss California Carrie Prejean in the Miss USA Pageant, when asked about same sex marriage. While Britney is indeed freaky, on several levels, her freakishness, when we take away the context of her tweet, did not appear open or obvious above and beyond that of your average everyday freak.

Britney got 9% of the popular vote, and a score of 21 out of a possible 100 points from our international panel of esteemed judges.

Adam Lambert was determined to openly and obviously display a level of freakishness above and beyond that of the normal freak. One judge, speaking on the condition of anonymity, said " Adam clearly has what it takes to win Freak of the Year."

But the judges determined that Adam's freakishness this week, was somewhat less than he has displayed in the past.

Adam got 17% of the popular vote and was awarded a score of 62 out of a possible 100 from our expert judges.

The Burger King King was determined to also exhibit a level of freakishness above and beyond that of the normal freak. In or out of context, it was determined that He demonstrates an extreme freakishness that is overt, obvious and generally offensive. He has already been nominated for Freak of the Year, and receives more nominations and endorsements every week.

The King got an overwhelming 72% of the popular vote, and a score of 96 out of a possible 100 from our judging panel.

2% of the popular vote remained undecided.

So, with this victory, the King moves on in the competition and will be the reigning champion in next weeks Freak of the Week challenge.

We are looking for your nominations. Who do you think can unseat the Burger King King as Freak of the Week?

Please leave a comment with your nomination.

Garden update

In 1978, David Mallet, wrote The Garden Song. Every year, around this time, as I get the gardening bug, I think about that song. Arlo Guthrie recorded it at one time, and a more popular version was sung on the Muppet Show, by John Denver.

But I like the original, by Dave Mallet, and I find myself humming it to myself, as I play in the garden.

Here is Dave Mallet himself, singing his song:



The song went through my head as I lifted the lid on my "greenhouse"
and saw all the baby plants starting to grow.

This is my favorite part of gardening, I feel like a little kid, and I want to run in every morning and check them, as soon as I get up. There aren't any real leaves yet, but they are a whole lot of little seedlings.













Of course, there are a lot more than I will need, and eventually they will have to be thinned out, but I'm hoping to have some strong healthy plants to choose from.


It kind of makes me feel like a farmer. Maybe I'll go put my overalls on and chew on a long piece of grass, and scratch my head and talk about the weather.

Reckon it'll rain?

My Challenge to the Auto Industry

OK, I see the same TV ads everyone else sees. General Motors is doing the whole, "We can do this America" things and it makes for a good campaign except for one thing. Nothing changed. They aren't doing anything different except for using the economic crisis to sell cars.

So, I would like to take the opportunity to issue a challenge to General Motors, and to Ford Motor Company.

You want bail out money? You want the United States to help you out of a crisis? I'm ok with that. The auto industry is a big part of what made our country great in the last century, and it represents a bigger part. It represents the everyday Americans who go to work, and do their job, and go home, and keep our country moving. The auto industry has been there through the tough times. We owe it to them, to be there for them.

So, here is my challenge.

You want to show your American Spirit? You want us to put our "Rally Caps" on and rally with you? You want to prove that you, as corporations, and we, as American People are on the same side?

Here's how to do it.

STEP 1)

Pick one model from your 2010 line up. Doesn't matter which one. Just pick one. Any one.

Build that vehicle entirely in the USA. Make sure that every piece, every part, every nut, bolt washer and grommet, every seal, o-ring, and bearing, from the tires, right up to the radio antenna, and everything in between are made in the USA.

Make a truly American Made car.

I know that you can't do that with every vehicle you sell right now. I understand that it just wouldn't be feasible or practical, at this point. But do it with one. If you can only afford to make a few thousand of them, that's fine. Make as many as you can. But make them in the United States of America. Don't put a single foreign part, piece or component on that car anywhere.

STEP 2

Stand behind that car.

Forget about this 36,000 mile thing, or this five year power train thing, or any of the other gimmicky things that means you will weasel out of making a warranty repair. Truly stand behind that car. 10 years, or 100,000 miles, whichever comes first. Anything goes wrong, fix it.

Don't squabble, don't dicker or bicker, don't weasel, don't make excuses, or offer long explanations about how or why it's not truly a warranty issue. Just fix it.

Again, I don't expect you to stand behind every car you make, at least not at first. But stand behind the True American Car. Let the American people know that you have faith in them. That you believe in them. That you stand behind America, just like you are asking America to stand behind you right now.

As an American, and as a resident of Michigan, I stand firmly behind the Auto Industry.

I recognise the contribution the industry has made to our state, our nation and our world.

I understand that the industry has done so much, for so long, for so many, that it is only fair that we, as Americans give some back.

But I just want to make sure that all this talk of "We can do it" and "Get our rally caps on" is sincere, and not just some empty rhetoric, dreamed up by an ad man in a back office.

Step up to the plate folks. Show us you mean it.

Make an American car and stand behind it.

That's my challenge.

If you agree, please pass this along.
If you strongly agree, print it out and mail it.

Here is some information:

Ford Motor Company
Customer Relationship Center
P.O. Box 6248
Dearborn, MI 48126

General Motors Corporation
P.O. Box 33170
Detroit, MI 48232-5170

Shuttin' Detroit Down

OK, first of all, let me just say that although I have been a country fan most of my life, I never really liked the music produced by the band Big & Rich. Their style just didn't match mine.
But, I have to say that since he has launched his solo career, I have started to like John Rich, more and more.

That being said, his latest song is one that everyone needs to hear.

Read the lyrics, watch the video.

It makes one think!

If the video doesn't start on it's own, you may have to click the "Play" button.

Tax Day Tyranny

April 15.

Tax Day.

The day every year when we, as Americans, collectively and voluntarily allow the theft of our money to be legitimized.

Income tax.

Another way of saying, if you receive something, someone else is automatically entitled to a portion of it.

So, as a marketing gimmick, and a way to draw people into their businesses, many companies offered special giveaways or freebies on Tax day. Cinnabon, Subway, McDonalds, MaggieMoos, just to name a few in this area...

Being a good friend of the Chief Editor as well as the Lead Writer of The Thrifty Groove, a blog dedicated to helping people save money, even in a tough economy, I felt like I had the inside scoop on where to find the best deals, and where to get the best freebies!

Hah!

My first attempt at a freebie was a Subway in Ann Arbor. Subway was supposed to be giving a free cookie to anyone who asked. There were no signs about a free cookie, but I asked them anyway. Neither employee had any idea what I was talking about.



Then I went to McDonalds. The first McDonalds was opened on April 15, so they had twice the reason to recognize the day. They were offering various promotions around the country being reported on news sites and blogs everywhere. The employees at the McDonalds in Ann Arbor had no idea what I was talking about.

Next, I visited Cinnabon, in Taylor, where they were supposed to be giving free Cinnabites. they had a sign posted advertising their free tax day Cinnabites. I bought a drink, and without even having to be asked, the employee offered me two free Cinnabites. Woohoo! Things are looking up!

I walked across the hallway to Subway and asked about the free cookie, they looked at me like I was asking if I could borrow their car or something.... No freebie there!

I stopped on my way home at a local McDonalds and again asked about the Tax Relief Special. After a long pause the employee answered, "We don't do that. Do you have a coupon or something?" I told her it was on their web site, she again replied, "Oh, we don't do that".

So, I came home Big Mac-less

Moral of the story.

Businesses, like government, often promise more than they deliver.

April 15 can be a reminder of that.

The, "Can I Be A Normal Person?" Challenge

OK, I know I am capable of things other than wild rants and opinions which, although generally (always) right, can sometimes be worded a bit more emphatically than one may see on the more sissy-prissy blogs one may read.

So, In the spirit of the buzz phrase of 2009, "These Tough Economic Times", I have decided that I am going to give our herb garden a little extra push and see what kind of results we can get this year.

We have been working for a couple of years on growing some fresh herbs. We both like to cook. We use fresh herbs to cook, and we have fun growing them. Not to mention, that when it is time to dry them, I do it on cookie sheets that I set in my truck, and the truck smells absolutely delicious.

For the next little while , I am therefore, going to attempt regular blog segments dedicated to my gardening adventures.

Of course, I will make sure and include a rant or two, just to keep myself sane.

So, I got one of those little trays with all the peat pellets ($5 Walmart)

and some seeds, and I am going to attempt to germinate some plants, and transplant them outside. If it works, we will have way more herbs than we need, or can use, and we will be sharing them. If it doesn't, the evidence will be here on my blog, for the world to critique, and mock, at their own leisure.

These things are incredibly easy to use, and easy to figure out. The directions are written in 3 different languages, in case you want to practice your linguistic skills while you wait for the plants to grow.

The first thing you do is open the package and add water.

There are a whole bunch of little pellets, that look like miniature hockey pucks that are actually peat moss, and potting soil, wrapped in a biodegradable netting and compressed into a wafer. They expand when they get wet, kind of like those little foam lobsters that you get at the dollar store.

Once they are done growing, like tiny little alien creatures, right before your very eyes, you are ready to plant your seeds.

I use a pencil to make a hole, not because the package says to use a pencil, but because that's what my mom used when she used peat pellets, way back when I was a kid. Just push it down through the netting and into the peat about an inch, or whatever depth it says on your particular seed packet, when you pull it out you have a nice hole to drop your seeds into.

Because I have big fingers, and seeds are so tiny, I like to pour them out of the package and into some kind of dish. That way I can control them a little bit better.

(This also allowed me to discover that one of my packets was labelled "Contains 100 seeds", and it actually only had 47, but that's the beginning of a rant and this entry is rant-free)

I dropped three seeds into each hole.

My grandpa used to put 4 kernels of corn in each hole.

He said:

One for the magpie,

One for the crow,

One for the cutworm,

One to grow.

I'm hoping no magpies, crows, or cutworms find their way into our house, but I remember from a project in Boy Scouts years ago, that seeds only have about a 50-75% germination rate, and that was under ideal conditions. If every seed actually grows, I will have lots of little seedlings, and can then choose the strongest and healthiest ones to move to the garden.

After you drop the seeds in the hole, you just push the peat back down to close up the hole, and Voila! It's that easy. The cover goes back on, making a little greenhouse, and you wait 3-7 days for the seeds to germinate.

Waiting was always my least favorite part.

So, I have 72 little pellets. Mini planters, if you will, each with 3 tiny seeds inside.

I planted one row, or six pellets, of cherry tomatoes. One row each of Sweet Basil, Bush Basil, and Genovese Basil, and two rows of Purple Basil. Not because Purple Basil is any better, but because I am hoping it will add some color and variety to our garden.

That left me with six rows to plant. I planted two rows each of Spearmint, Rosemary and Thyme. All three of these are supposed to be perennials, (Meaning they come back every year.) We haven't had a lot of success with Rosemary making it through the winter here, so I hope to get a plant or two that I can keep inside through the winter as well.

We have been trying to build a solid base of perennials and then work the annuals in around them.

We already have a healthy Sage plant, a good solid Oregano plant, two healthy Savory bushes, (Probably need to give one of those away this year). A good patch of Chives, and several good clumps of Garlic.

I got a Sweet Marjoram plant at the end of the season last year, and planted it. It didn't grow very much last year, but I'm hoping it does better this year.

We also have more Dill than we need. We planted it one year and it grows wild in our herb garden every year now. It's not supposed to be a perennial, but it seeds off. It's easy to see why it is called Dill Weed, because It can get out of control if you let it, but we try to keep it cut when it starts to get too high, and don't let it go crazy until toward the end of the season.

The seeds I planted today will all be welcome additions to our garden, if they all grow.

Check back here for regular gardening updates.

I am also interested in any tips, suggestions, ideas, for using fresh herbs, drying herb. or any other recipes or ideas that my fellow herbalists may have.

Leave me a comment and let me know what herbs you grow, and how you use them.

Tigers... Grrr

Ok.... So.... I just got home from a freaky, hectic day in Downtown Detroit.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm a regular Baseball's Biggest Fan. Whenever there's a game, from the Red Sox to the Bobby Sox, I'm out there, waving my pennant, hoping to catch a foul ball.

Or, like they say back in my home country:

Me llevan a la bola de juego,
Me lleve a la multitud.
Comprarme unos cacahuetes y cracker-jacks,
No me importa si yo nunca volver.

But there's a time for peanuts and Cracker Jacks, and there's a time for conducting business. Noon, on a weekday is no time to shut down a major metropolitan area, and open up the streets to block parties, beer fests and general public displays of revelry.

Yeah, folks I'm as happy as could be that the Tigers are playing their season opener here at home.

I'm just as thrilled as you that we beat the socks (Sox) off Texas 15-2. But get a grip folks.

Some of us still have things to do that don't involve closing down entire city blocks, diverting traffic and playing music at a decibel level loud high enough that the United Federation of Planets Tigers fans can hear Slappa the Rappa and his posse of Crappa hip hoppin' about who is gonna put who down.

It's just a game for heavens sake. A bunch of grown men, running around on a field chasing a little ball and hitting it with sticks.

So, it marks the end of a winter that we, especially here in Michigan could have done without.
So, it represents spring, new beginnings, new life, Good Friday and all that stuff.

Yeah, it was a nice day, the sun was shining, the flowers are blooming and little birds are chirping in the tree tops. It was a good day to get out, see the sunshine, smell the flowers.

But couldn't people do that just as well in the privacy of their own homes?
Why is it necessary to shut down the streets of a major city to have a party.
Do we want the rest of the world to think that nobody around here has a job?

It's a Sad, Sad World...

Alas, even in today's world of technology, when we think we have all the answers, the human factor enters in.

Last Night's American Idol was just such an example.

Now before we get into the rant part, lets explore a few facts:

Fact 1, Lineup.
Whenever a show of this nature calls for viewers to vote, and doesn't start the the votes until the show is over, the final slot on the lineup is the coveted slot. That's the performance that everyone remembers.

Hence the keynote speaker at conferences is always last. The band never plays before their warm-up group at concerts.

Fact 2, Influence
The producers of American Idol certainly allow America to vote, but they also know that they are expected to advance a career for whomever wins, so they have to do everything in their power to make sure that the winner is someone they want to work with.

Fact 3, unexplainable phenomenon.
For whatever bizarre and unexplainable reason, the producers of American Idol think Adam "Freak Boy" Lambert is a superstar, worthy of their everlasting fawning and attention.

Ok, Now we have the facts out of the way, lets deal with reality.

He's a freakin freak! He may have talent, but he chooses instead to hide his talent, not under a bushel, but under a bucket. The bucket that he should have used to carry his tune. His voice sounds like a combination between a bagpipe with a hole in it and a mouse running around the bottom of a metal can.

He screeches, squeals and shrieks like an amateur soundtrack for a 1960's independent sci-fi film and the judges act like he just lip synched Frank Sinatra.

He has proven that he has the ability to look good, if he chooses to do so, but instead he appears on stage looking like a Village People rendition of a futuristic Elvis Presley having a bad hair day.

Seriously, the guy could take some tips from Jack McFarland on how to appear more masculine. The funny thing is going to be when he comes out, and all of the teeny-girls who have been going gaga, and texting votes at 10 cents a pop on their parents cell phone bills all discover that it really is Adam and Steve, not Adam and Eve. (Not that there's anything wrong with that but ...)

So anyway,

Last night, American Idol, as always, set Adam Lambert up to be a superstar. They gave him the cherry on the cake, the "pimp position" singing last, so as to garner more votes. What they didn't figure on was that the guy with the timer must have been on vacation, because the show ran 8 minutes over, and all those people who set their Tivos didn't get to see Adam screech his way through Tears for Fears song Mad World.

Oh well, too bad, so sad.

I'm just afraid that if he actually gets eliminated, because of this, he will cry foul, the judges will use their judges save, the producers will decide it was a technical error, and give them a new judges save, and Adam will have skated through one more horrific performance.

I wish he would just get his falsetto butt back to whatever garage band he plays with and leave the singing to the real singers.

I don't get it

Why is it, I'd like to know, that so many people in this country have such a penchant for re-electing idiots?

This is not a new thing, by any means. From mayors to senators to presidents,nationally, locally, and in various places around the country. (can you spell Chappaquiddick ?)

It boggles my mind. Someone gets sent to prison on drug charges, and so when he gets out, to show how glad we are that he is reformed, we elect him mayor of Washington DC.
Someone can cheat his way through school, hide in the military in an appointed position his dad gets for him, wreck a car and kill someone, rack up a variety of criminal charges and scandals and still be elected to office.

OK, I can see that, I don't agree, I don't like it, I don't vote for them myself, but I can see it.
But then, when that person gets into office and has wild, illicit parties in the mayoral mansion, smokes pot on the White House roof with Willie, and proves to the world that they had no business being elected and what do we do?

Do we impeach them? Censure them? Flay them? Tar, feathers, run out of town on a rail?

No, of course not!
We re-elect the bozos.

Nationally we have all seen it. Locally, I am once again beside myself in utter amazement as the fine city of Detroit, which has not yet recovered from the scandals and turmoil surrounding the recent mayor, struggles with a city council president who has been nothing but loud obnoxious trouble since as long as I have lived in Michigan and has managed, during that time, to work her way from obnoxious and irritating council member to obnoxious and irritating council president.

Now, she not only gets to act like the world owes her something (as well as all her family members who she finds jobs in city government) but she has the power and authority to get it.

How can Detroit hold it's head up and ask the Federal Government for help in their time of need with one face, and elect people like this to public office with the other?

Do the voters of Detroit really have no clue? Or are they actually proud of they way people like this and the former mayor make them look in the eyes of the rest of the world?

Well, I for one, have set my mind to developing a solution, and I think I have it.

It's a win/win situation.

I propose that we sell the city of Detroit to Canada. In exchange for taking Detroit, they can have our half of the bridge and any and all profits made there. And the tunnel.

All we ask is that they work with us in erecting a large solid wall between Detroit and Michigan.

We would of course lose the Detroit Tigers, which would be sad, but they would get the Lions, so that balances that out.

I'd hate to see the Red Wings go, but with them becoming a Canadian team, the total of Stanley cup championships claimed by Canada would be a 48, one more incentive for Canada, (who may reasonably and justifiably balk at the deal.)

After all, Canada has never really believed that the USA knew anything about Hockey anyway.

Next time you hear a fan yell "Go Detroit" ask yourself, are they cheering for the team? Or are they encouraging the city to leave.

My money is on the latter.

Mini Rant

So.......... I was watching the news tonight and there was a story about a 65 year old man somewhere in the metro area who had gone missing.

Sad story, family distraught, all that stuff.

OK. I can see that, but then the newscaster, not a family member, but a newscaster, went on to say that the man's house had been broken into and robbed.

OK, folks. News flash here.

A House CAN NOT be robbed. A house can be burglarized, a house can be broken into, burned, damaged and invaded, but it cannot be robbed.

Robbery involves force or fear. If I pick your pocket, I haven't robbed you. If I throw you to the ground and take your wallet, I have robbed you. If I point a gun at you or even tell you I have a gun. and take your wallet, I have robbed you. But in order to be robbed, you must be an animate object. I can rob you, your sister, your friend, your neighbor, your co-worker, or the guy who works the night shift at the power plant, but I cannot rob your house.

A house is not alive.

I don't expect everyday people to know the difference, but a freakin' newscaster, whose job it is to get the facts straight, should know the difference.

When newscasters don't know their information, maybe we have all been robbed.